Sunday, February 2, 2014

Loving These Kids

Highlights from my Romanian journal:

Today D walked 21 steps! Last Friday they walked 3, so today we got them out of their walker and I would scoot away and say “Hai!”(come here!) and they'd stand up and totter over. They got to 8 steps, then 16, and then I really wanted to get them to 20, and we got to 21! I was so proud of them. 

Now D just likes to stay up and cruise around. They can be stable for forever, 25+ steps, and they're good at staying balanced because other kids bump into them all the time when they don't watch where they're going, and D's good at stabilizing themself. Mostly they likes to walk about 1 foot away from me, and then turn around and come back and fall into me so I'll catch them. D loves when I catch them and say “Bravo D!” and wrap them in my arms. That's when D smiles the sweetest little smile- they are so happy and proud of themself.

FHE: With some older guys in the ward, and the missionaries, and us. I got really into pictionary, and I got the older guys laughing. After I tried to illustrate “ambition” by drawing a guy trying to jump over a cliff and then falling down, Brother L straight up told me, “I could not tell what you were drawing. You need to be more clear. You should have made the arrow over the cliffs longer. You are not a good drawer. I could not understand you.” I said I was sorry, and then just laughed. He wasn't laughing. He was serious. I kept laughing in my heart. I love the Romanian bluntness. It's the best.

The kindergarten is going good. I like doing it, which is good, because I'm signed up to be a teacher. Discipline is the hardest part, especially when the kids are so wild. Luckily the other teachers help us with that. The kids love to sing songs- 5 Little Monkeys, Wheels on the Bus, Head Shoulders Knees and Toes, and the Itsy Bitsy Spider. They also love the Little People barn with the farm animals. That will be our Friday treat. I will keep doing the kindergarten the next week and the week after that. And of course, the best part is getting big hot pretzels on our way home for 60 bani (18 cents). Oh man- those things are so good.

Dinner tonight was good too- smoked cheese with rice and broccoli and carrots and chicken and a German Chocolate bar with creamy coconut centers for dessert. We eat like kings over here. We go through bread and chocolate and juice like no other. And it's all so cheap! A nice big loaf of bread is the equivalent of 30 cents in the US. We went shopping last Saturday, and we'll have to go again tomorrow (Thursday) for another 3 loaves and 3 bars and 3 juice cartons. Yeah baby. My favorite is the cherry juice, the bread that has chocolate in it and tastes like licorice, and the kinder chocolate. I could probably die on that stuff.

Today was another wonderful, but very very very cold day. As soon as we went outside my nose hairs froze and my boogers froze and my chin started hurting. Luckily the sun was shining, I guess. :)

My kids are doing wonderfully! A is standing up well and holding onto that little play counter by the bookshelf full of toys now, but only if I am sitting on the same counter. I don't even have to be holding them or even that close- as long as I am within 2 feet, and in their peripheral vision, and they feel like they have their safety net where they are free to explore and use their feet- as if they feel like I am watching over them or something. I can even be preoccupied doing something else or playing with another kid on my lap, but if I stand up and leave from sitting on that counter, ther feet crumple and they start whining. Kids need to feel safe before they will adventure. Otherwise they will be inhibited. Textbook from human development. Makes me feel special in A's life.
 
Today in the middle of the day, all of a sudden a group of 12 prospective foster parents came into the room to try out all the children- talking to them, playing with them. I told the parents their different names so they could call the kids by name. It was a very emotional experience for me. Because 1) I love these kids, and I know these kids need families. But 2) I want these kids to be in my family. A selfish part of me came out- why do these parents get to be the lucky ones to take these kids home? I would take 2 specific ones of them home in a heartbeat. I love them so much. With all those parents in the room, with all the kids, I felt outnumbered, and kind of just stood back and watched it all. I even got a little teary, but I put on a smile and held back the tears. I want these kids to have a mom and a dad- but I want them to have a good one- not smokers or someone who isn't going to have time for them. If so- let the kids stay here and play with me! Or- maybe they can have foster parents, as long as they come back to the orphanage from 8-12 Monday through Friday so I can still love them too. :) It was a very emotional experience. Fortunately, or unfortunately, there were so many loud parents all talking simultaneously and asking questions that the kids all got really inhibited and scared- they didn't smile, they didn't talk. They all pulled into their bubble. I wanted the kids to smile so the parents would know what happy and content kids they are, but I also didn't want them to be too attractive that the parents would take them away too quickly. :) Even M wouldn't say anything.  For a minute, I thought, “This isn't fair- why do they get to be foster parents and I don't get to?” Probably because they have jobs and can take care of foster kids, and I'm a freshman in college, and the have like 15 years on me. How I wish I could take some of those kids home with me- or at least to Marlene or Sunny or someone who would really love them and take good care of them- not a smokey family who is considering foster care because the state will pay them to do it, and they need another income.

Another high for the day was snuggling with D. I got them out of their play pen and snuggled with them on the mattress on the ground. They loved it. They were laying on their belly and I laid over them on the ground and held their hands so they didn't do weird things with their hands like bending their fingers back so far or biting theirself (they do stuff like that because that's the only cause and effect they has any control over in life- so they does things to their body that they can feel- even if they don't feel good. At least they never draw blood when they bite theirself.) And I put D's face right up against mine, talked to them. They smiled and liked it, and when I moved, they moved towards me again and put their nose up against mine. Oh- how I love that kid.

On the way home from kindergarten, we tried our first Gogosi. It will not be out last! We're in the habit of getting pretzels- but I think it might be the gogosi across the street now. It tastes like a scone- with powdered sugar all over it. Like a dream. And it's huge- for only one leu, or 28 US cents. Divinity baby. 

I love my kids. I miss them on the weekends. I love Bradley. I love my Lord.

No comments:

Post a Comment